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patronsaint02
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Name: Chris
Country: United States
State: New Hampshire
Birthday: 5/5/1981
Gender: Male
Interests: drum corps, drums, copeland, easy mac, when i think of more i will post them!
Occupation: Student
Industry: Media
Message: message meEmail: email me
AIM:  wicksnh
Member Since:
5/4/2004
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| life has NEVER been so hard ..... 
pray for me
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| well .... currently I am on spring break .... in southern Illinois
LOL. Seriously though, it is not as bad as it sounds. I am
chillin with my boys Jon and Jameson watching simpsons, and alot of
random movies in the apartment!! As weird as this is going to
sound, it has been an amazing break!! BUT even more exciting I get to
go to Chicago this weekend to visit my best friend Nick!! SOOOO
EXCITED! we have not hung out in AGES!! seriously, i am really really
excited.
so ... 7 weeks ... then I am gone, moving on with my life.
honestly, it is very hard not to think about. Everything in my
life is going to change, wow ......... I am just praying for God's
leading and direction ...... where will he take me next!? the sad thing
is what i am leaving .... these next 7 weeks are probably going to be
the hardest 7 weeks of my life so far, between school work, realizing
that I am gonna be leaving all of my friends, just gonna emotionally,
and physically drain me .... breath ....
I dare you to move!
<><
Wixy
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| i guess right now i am a mess lol! hahah but what else is new right!? i
promise that one of these days i will have a happy entry.
soooooo ok this summer I will be going to Michigan, to intern as a
technical director at a church called Daybreak (www.daybreak.tv).
I am very excited about this opportunity given to me!! It will
only be until August, sooo maybe after that I will get to go to
California??
ok ... so this is it, last two months of school comming up! kinda
scary, and i know that i shouldn't be thinking about leaving yet, but i
am really going to miss alot of people here in the villages of
green. I am very much so a people person, and I have realized
lately that there are sooo many people here that i care about, new
people that i am meeting that I will never have a chance to get to
know, and then those whom i know very well .... it is going to be hard
to leave all of you ... kinda been heavy on my heart lately.
struggles .... just like everyone else, i have my struggles ... i am
not comfortable enough to share them but i just ask for your prayers.
hahah on a weird note, i have really been wanting to makeout lately lol!! hahahh yeah ....
have you ever just had a day where you felt like you just needed to cry? i have those days.
night ...
<><
Wixy
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| soo i am about do for an update on my life huh? ..... well here we go:
Right now my life seems pretty crazy with getting ready to graduate and
all. I am trying to find a future career, taking 18 credits, and
trying to just salvage what time i have left with my friends whom truly
care about me. It is a very weird feeling and i can't really
explain it.
something that has been bothering me lately ..... i guess you can say
that i am a very relational person and i value friendships
greatly. sometimes i feel like i am a friend to those at
convenience, just how i feel i guess.
my mom is sick again ... she got rushed to the ER the morning.
Sucks being so far away and I love here and care about her soo much
that I worry about her.
my future .... michigan or california .... which one, i have no clue
.... so hard to decide and I am not making a decision based on location
but based on Gods leading in my life.
friendships ... although I have and am being hurt ... doesn't take away
that fact that I still care ... i guess that when it shows when someone
could care less about me as a friend, it is like a knife stabbing
through me .. maybe that is my problem .... maybe i give to much into
my friendships that being hurt is just gonna happen anyways? what do
you think?
anyways ... God is good  only good can come from the struggles going on in my life right now ....
night!
<><
Wixy
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| you know what is frustrating .... when you find out that someone lied
to you about something.... one of the biggest things that you can do to
hurt me is to lie to me! it is like breaking my heart in two ..........
deception ... lies ..... and i have such a hard time confronting people
who do it to me cause i am such a loving person .... i dunno it also
stinks when it is someone close to you, or whom you think you are close
to .... if you want to break my heart, lie to me ... that will do it!
all i ask is that those who know me and care about me .... be honest
with me all the time, even if it will hurt me ...
you know ... i am just gonna say that i am sorry ... that last couple
entries have been sad .. guess thats when i need to write to get it all
out .. things in my life are rough, and i try not to show it cause i
want everyone to see me happy ... when on the inside i am hurting all
the time. is that a bad thing? i hate letting people know my faults and
struggles ... i think that people think i am messed up or whatever ...
i always assume that we are supposed to be strong individuals ...
confident ... i always try and help everyone!! i care so much about
people and my friends ... God and my friends are what keep me going ..
i value each an every friendship that i have soo much!! but in the end
.... i just let all of my pains and troubles build up inside of me ....
and i don't tell a soul .... cause i want everyone to see me as a happy
loving person whom they can go to at all times for anything .... is
that bad? i dunno ...
good night ......
<><
Wixy
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